WORLD CUP: Solid Australians tick the boxes

The 2011 ICC Cricket World Cup is already entering its second week, and after 10 matches of varying competitiveness and quality, it is difficult to discern whether this World Cup is destined to be a success yet. The fortunes of the tournament lie in the same unsure pensive state as the chances of the team who have dominated so thoroughly over the past decade.

I'm not a man who gets involved in a lot of these fancy new technologies (this esteemed blog aside), but doing the Internet rounds you find certain trending dialogues in social media inescapable. The latest common discourse is that this tournament  is already feeling overlong, and that there has been barely any competitive cricket in a week.

Sure, there have been inevitable logistical imperfections such as the ticketing problems for the final in Mumbai, but this is the ICC we're talking about and no Cricket expert would have expected competency from such an organisation. There hasn't been a last-ball classic yet either and we've had our fair share of huge thrashings, but all in all it's been solid viewing. Cynicism seems to be a job requirement for cricket punditry these days. It is the in-thing to pour scorn on every World Cup in the last 20 years because of the minor flaws inherent in the formats and fortuitous happenings of each tournament. In truth, of the last five World Cups, only 2007 left a sour taste in my mouth or the mouths of anyone I know.

As a wonderfully lethargic home pundit, I haven't had to experience the frustration of many (often delayed) flights back and forth around the subcontinent. I haven't had to experience India's stifling heat nor have I viewed the panorama of empty stadiums during neutral clashes. But this is the perspective of 99% of the Cricket fanatics watching this World Cup, many of whom have watched every ball just as I have, even at the late hours the games run to in Australia.

The ten games so far have all had their own unique charms. Only three have had any lasting tension late in the match but you can't expect thrillers every day from any tournament, even that model of efficiency the Football World Cup. These one-sided contests have been somewhat skewed towards the front of the tournament as well. More one-sided humiliations will come, but tight high-quality contests should pepper throughout with increasing regularity. The only real nagging problem with the World Cup is that the top 4 in each group advance to the Quarter Finals, and barring any miracles the Quarter Finalists are essentially a foregone conclusion. But each match can still be enjoyed on its own merits, and there are many marquee clashes to come, starting tonight when India face England in Bengaluru.

As the World Cup goes on, the paths of its participants will start to diverge. Some teams will ride a wave of good form, others will sink into an interminable trough, some should fluctuate wildly. Then there is the major upset or two which always finds a way of happening. The Quarter Finalists may be easy to pick, but their order isn't whatsoever.

As for Australia, they have had two comfortable wins, but still don't look convincing.There have been brilliant patches from the raging pace trio of Lee, Tait and Johnson, and the top order pairing of Watson and Haddin have looked as dominant as ever, but there are still huge questions marks over the depth in either department. Neither Zimbabwe nor New Zealand tested the Aussies, whose basic skills were enough alone to do the job. The first big test will come against Sri Lanka on Saturday. Last night came the first result that could reasonably be called an upset, with Pakistan's 11 run win over Sri Lanka. Pakistan's triumph last night could halt Sri Lanka's rampant ODI confidence, which started late last year with their series win in Australia. Sri Lanka remain favourites for the match in my book, but Pakistan might just have done Australia a great favor.

This week in sporting history: THE UNDERARM INCIDENT

February 1 marked three decades since modern cricket's most infamous moment of controversy, the underarm delivery Australian captain Greg Chappell ordered his brother Trevor to bowl as the final ball of a One-Day International against New Zealand.
For Greg it was a major blip on what was a glittering but always controversial career. For the unfortunate underachieving Trevor, he will always be remembered for his role in the debacle.

The defining visual of the underarm incident is Trevor Chappell rolling the ball along the ground towards New Zealand batsman Brian McKechnie, who threw his bat away in disgust. The wider context of the day cannot be forgotten however, as it adds to the sheer drama of the event, and highlights what a devastating anti-climax is ultimate conclusion was. World Series Cricket was barely two years in the past, and had given Australian cricket with its legacy of spectacular day-night One Day cricket with coloured clothing and white balls. To continue this popular new fad, the Australian Cricket Board established an annual triangular tournament of one-day matches involving Australia and two touring teams to be played over the summer in conjunction with the Test matches. The World Series Cup began in 1979 and, under different names, continued until 2007 when it was replaced by the current format of five-to-seven match bilateral seiries', adding to the over-saturation of superfluous one day contests.

This was a time when the Australian public, driven by youth, were captivated by the spectacle of 50 over One-Day Cricket.  In the modern age of over-scheduling, most one day series hold little interest to anyone outside the immediate playing group. It can be hard nowadays to even imagine a context where an Australian captain could find the result of 'just another one-dayer' so desperately essential as to commit such a foul act. Not that Greg Chappell would ever have considered even the most inconsequential dead rubber anything other than vitally important and worthy of full effort. For all of his faults, this was the genesis of Chappell's cricketing genius.

In the summer of 1980-81, New Zealand and India visited in what was an evenly matched series filled with tense clashes that continued to delight the public. As it was, India were inconsistent and over time faded to finish a clear 3rd, and Australia and New Zealand qualified for the five-match finals series. On February 1 the teams were at the MCG for Game 3, with the series tied at 1-1. So outside any World Cup there could be few more important one day matches. It could also be said that for Australians the home triangular series was more important than the World Cup, which at that point was a decidedly English venture with white clothes and Test-like conditions. World Series Cricket had moved Australia's interests away from this conservative English state of thinking towards the new exciting spectacle of day-night cricket.

 Australia amassed 235 from their 50 overs, on the back of a 90 from Greg Chappell which was predictably not without controversy itself. When 52 Chappell was caught in the outfield by Martin Snedden, but the catch was a tight one with the ball close to the ground and Chappell stood his ground. Snedden was adamant the catch was taken but Chappell did not walk and the umpires called not-out. Later replays showed the catch was indeed cleanly taken. New Zealand's reply was anchored by a stellar century from opener Bruce Edgar, who batted throughout the 50 overs for 102 not out.

Entering the final over New Zealand were 6 for 221, requiring 15 with barnstorming all-rounder Richard Hadlee (now Sir Richard) new to the crease and on strike. An error in bowling calculations from Chappell meant that he was left with the far from optimum option of brother Trevor to bowl the final over. On a pitch which was playing absurdly low by today's standards, Hadlee took four off the first ball but then was trapped  LBW. No.9 Ian Smith was able to mishit a couple of swings into the outfield and scramble a pair of twos before being bowled. This left New Zealand at 8 for 229 with little known medium pacer Brian McKechnie the new batsman. Seven were needed to win, a six could tie it and take the teams to Game 4 with the series still locked up. As they say, the rest is history.

For thirty years since that fateful day, Greg Chappell's actions have gone down as a definitive low point in Australian sporting folklore. Relations between Australia and New Zealand were strained like never before. No sporting controversy had caused such wide ranging national antagonism between Australia and a political ally since Bodyline. New Zealand prime minister Robert Muldoon called the underarm delivery "the most disgusting incident I can recall in the history of cricket." But in reality, there were few genuine repercussions outside cricketing circles, as people on both sides of the Tasman for the most part agreed it had been a low act. But the fact remains, sliding a ball up the pitch underarm was not prohibited in the tournament laws. The overriding question mark of why this was the case is what really astonishes many people. I've been asked many times why such a ridiculous happening could legally occur in the first place. One element is simply that the very bizarreness of every possible unpredictable event can't be legislated against. But there is a wider context, that of the origins of bowling itself.

In the earliest centuries of Cricket the default form of bowling, the only form for all intents and purposes, was underarm. Cricket drew many similarities from bowls, and the ball was delivered in a similar way on similar grass surfaces. The only ostensible difference was the presence of a batsman. Although there's no concrete evidence as to how cricket surfaced, it's easy to imagine a lawn bowls patron accidentally striking a moving ball with a plank of wood, the seed of an idea dawning in his eyes. It would rival the romantic origins of Rugby (supposedly invented when an enterprising young student at Rugby School in England picked up a football mid-game and ran off the pitch with it). Until well into the 19th century, bowling was done either by the original rolling method, or by a pitched variant where the ball was delivered underarm, but projected airborne. Many specialist bowlers, most notably the revolutionary Edward "Lumpy" Stevens, began to develop the art of bowling, discovering and studying phenomena such as spin and air resistance, and learning the physics of bowling. An extremely subtle art involving precise lines and lengths developed, but it was still all underarm.

It wasn't until well into the early part of the 19th century that there were recorded occurrences of a new roundarm style, which may or may not look a bit like Mitchell Johnson. By the time Test Cricket began in 1876, underarm was largely superseded and the modern overarm style was dominant. Even into the the 20th century underarm bowling was a notable minority rather than a rarity. Until at least WWI there remained the odd underarm bowling professionals. Only in the last hundred years has it really disappeared from the game in any practical sense. Even still, instances of underarm bowling are peppered all the way through the 20th century, because of special circumstances such as injury or bowling action illegitimacy. Some forms of first-class cricket in time banned underarm entirely, or because of its anomalous nature specified that a bowler must notify the umpire of his intention to bowl underarm. However the ACB, in its running of the World Series Cup had omitted any specific rule prohibiting the practice. This was not because of any ideological deference towards the idea of underarm bowling but was merely an oversight born out of how unlikely such an occurrence would be. By 1981 the idea of delivering a ball underarm in an international was so foreign and inconceivable that when it suddenly happened, in such a high profile match and with such egregious and unsavoury motives, the shock waves were intense and still ring out thirty years later.

Local News Wrap: January 15-30 2011

Tennis

Injury denies Nadal/Djokovic thriller
2008 Australia Open Champion and perennial World No.3 Novak Djokovic finally broke the sophomore hoodoo off his back last Sunday by winning his second major at the 2011 Australian Open. In the process he scored emphatic wins over the great man Roger Federer in the semi-final, and Britain's favourite choker Andy Murray in the final, both in straight sets. His form was so ominous to suggest that he could have gone even to beating a full strength Rafael Nadal than he managed in losing last year's US Open final in 4 sets. Until his quarter-final Nadal looked quite unstoppable, but a torn muscle in his thigh which started to show up during a marathon second game left him helpless against consistent but hardly world-bearing countryman David Ferrer. The injury denied Rafa perhaps not a sure Rafa-Slam, completing a non-calendar year grand slam by adding the Australian Open titles to the French, Wimbledon and US which he won last year, but certainly denied us a titanic final between two masters of power.

Aussie Kim class of the field
Belgian superstar and long time Aussie fan favourite Kim Clijsters has finally won the Australian Open, her 4th grand slam title adding to the three US Open triumphs she achieved previously. Clijsters may have suffered lapses throughout the tournament and played a particularly below-par first set in the final, but that she still so emphatically and inevitably won a tournament where was far from her best highlights gulf in women's tennis. If both Williams sisters are fit and motivated, Clijsters is at her best, and the plethora of talented tour players but Grand Slam chokers like Wozniacki, Zvonareva and Jankovic play to their potential, women's tennis could be absolutely captivating. The added factor of someone like Li Na, sweeping all before her in reaching the Australian Open final, and stunning youngsters like Petra Kvitova, defy popular claims that women's tennis is in a rough patch. The problem is that the majority of these top ranked tour players remain underachievers, and the Williams sisters remain committed to their questionable program of minimal tennis, which noticeably has not helped decrease their propensity for injury. As it is there is Clijsters. Although she falters on clay and grass courts, its hard not to imagine Kim starting a hard court legacy in Melbourne and New York.


Football

Last chance heartbreak for the golden generation
Australia's ever beloved Socceroos are still licking the wounds from a devastating Asian Cup final, in which the Socceroos dominated every facet of play only to watch Japan steal Asian football's biggest prize 1-0 from a freak extra time strike by substitute Tadahari Lee. The loss potentially represents the final chance at international silverware for many of Australia's aging legends. The Socceroos campaign had gathered steam at the perfect pace, but one can't help but wonder if Japan's emotion charged semi-final penalty shootout win over South Korea primed them for the pressure moments more than Australia's rather leisurely 6-0 demolition of a foul Uzbekistan did. The Socceroos dominated the first half, but were unable to put away the many chances that presented themselves, helped by the sterling efforts of Japanese goal-keeper Eiji Kawashima.

As the pressure built in the second half there were lapses however, with the Socceroos lucky to escape from a few counter-attacking raids, and the enterprising play of the first half game way to a more predictable series of increasingly inaccurate crosses into the box. A brilliant save by Kawashima denied Harry Kewell one-on-one, but it was nevertheless a goal Harry should in any normal circumstance have put away. Lee's strike came in the 109th minute, shortly after the half way interval in extra-time, and came about inevitably from two tiny errors from the Socceroos left backs. Luke Wilkshire allowed Yuto Nagamoto to break clear and find space to cross to Lee who's fresh legs were able to wrong-foot a slightly off the ball David Carney, leaving Lee unmarked with the way clear for a spectacular finish.

Spectacular Roar seal historic achievement
The Hyundai A-League is about to enter its final fortnight, and the setup of the top 6 is nearly clear. After all the troubles and disruptions caused by the flood disaster, the Brisbane Roar have managed to stay on track, scoring tough wins 2-0 over the Wellington Phoenix and 2-1 over the Melbourne Heart. These results seal the club's first ever minor-premiership. The job coach Ange Postecoglou has done can not be underestimated. The unprecedented amount of player swaps he did before the new season raised question marks but have resulted in arguably the most dominant single season by an A-League team ever. But now they must complete the job, against more experienced finals teams.

The battle over the final two spots in the six is nearly settled now. The Heart needed victory over the Roar to stay in touch with crosstown rivals the Melbourne Victory who they drew with 2-2 in a thrilling local derby, and with the Wellington Phoenix who bookended their loss to Brisbane with impressive displays against the Perth Glory (2-0) and the Newcastle Jets 1-0. The Victory and Phoenix look somewhat safe for 5th and 6th now. The Heart will need to score an upset win over the in form Central Coast Mariners to retain any realistic hope, and the Jets would need a miracle. The Mariners on their part have pulled clear in the battle for 2nd with Adelaide United, after winning their grudge match 2-1, rather tempering United's

Full Ladder here.

Cricket

Weary poms feel Ashes hangover.
Australia's cricketers are saving some sort of face with some impressive one-day performances in the needlessly long seven-match series which is ongoing. Even more encouraging with the World Cup pending has been the quality of cricket and the drama, most games have remained competitive until late in the contest with two last over thrillers. For all the criticism of Australian cricket, a 4th successive World Cup may not be out of the question. Injuries have wreaked havoc with the squad as Michael Hussey, Nathan Hauritz, Xavier Doherty, Steve Smith and Shaun Tait have all come down with substantial injuries of varying severity. Hussey's hamstring tear in game 1 and Hauritz' shoulder dislocation while fielding in game 2 are the gravest concerns.  No player (with the possible exception of the superhuman Watson, and the comeback hero Lee) have showed any particularly consistency either. Yet through all the setbacks and periods of bad play, Australia lead the series 5-1, and everyone has put their hand up at some stage.

Game 1 was all about Watson's heroic 161 as Australia overhauled a formidable 294. Game 2 saw Hussey's replacement Shaun Marsh expose our idiotic selection policy by scoring 110 after not being picked for the World Cup. Australia were 4 for 33, then 8 for 142, yet still won comfortably in the end. Game 3 saw Brett Lee at his brilliant best and some useful overs from Xavier Doherty on his return to the team, before David Hussey and Brad Haddin overcame an early batting collapse to chase down 215. England won Game 4 but the performance of Steve Smith silenced his doubters with bat and ball. Captain Michael Clarke was the notable man missing from the form sheet. Then in Game 5 he made a gutsy 54 to anchor Australia's innings, before a disciplined display from the whole bowling line-up sealed a convincing win, and then struck a wonderful 82 off 70 balls in Game 6, leading Australia to a remarkable chase of 334, Australia's biggest ever successful run chase.

Even conceivable bit players like David Hussey, Steve Smith and John Hastings have performed well at times. The only player with no real form is Cameron White, but he is a class player and will surely come good sometime during the World Cup.

World Cup Groups

For the 2011 ICC Cricket World Cup starting next month, Australia have rather happily been drawn in Group A along with New Zealand, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Zimbabwe, Canada and Kenya. In the cricket that has passed since the two groups were finalised, various teams have gone on decisive upward and downward trends and created a notable gulf in the collective quality of the two groups. Comparatively this is how the theoretical pecking order fares between each group.

Group A

1. Australia - Reigning champions and No.1 side in the world, but struggling for form in all forms of cricket.

2. Sri Lanka - Should be Australia's only genuine consistent threat at the top of the group.

3. Pakistan - Always dangerous on their day, but with increasing rarity. Nowadays they're more often awful.

4. New Zealand - In a particularly horrible ODI rut, could be justifiably ranked only 9th in the grand scheme.

5. Zimbabwe - Still a country full of turmoil. The talent is there but they are unlikely to threaten.

6. Kenya - Used to being best of the rest but recently have gone backwards compared to other associates.

7. Canada - Surely the weakest team of the tournament, although they may fancy themselves against Kenya.

Group B

1. India - Impossible to split between India and South Africa as favourites, as shown by their current series.

2. South Africa - Always choke at World Cups but on paper India and South Africa are the clear standouts.

3. England - Faltering a bit against Australia, but conventional recent wisdom says they are third favourites.

4. West Indies - Still in their perpetual state of turmoil and disaster and should be outclassed, but still not bad.

5. Bangladesh - Genuinely competitive against anyone on their day, could easily oust Windies for 4th.

6. Ireland - Easily the best associate team and would fancy their QF chances over Windies and Bangladesh.

7. The Netherlands - Ever improving, should be easily last in the group but bring their best team to a WC yet.

Looking over that it is clear to see that Group B is a veritable group of death. The top two teams in Group B tower over the top two in Group A. Group A's 3rd and 4th teams are at best just above, maybe equal to Group B's 5th. Bangladesh and Zimbabwe have for a decade been perpetually 9th and 10th in the world, but nowadays Bangladesh are a mile above Zimbabwe, yet they remain 5th teams in both their groups. Finally Ireland and Netherlands more often than not would beat both Kenya and Canada. To drive my point home needlessly, here is my rough opinion on the overall rankings of the 14 teams' form and chances going in to the tournament.

1. India - B

2. South Africa - B

3. England - B

4. Australia - A

5.Sri Lanka - A

6. West Indies - B

7. Pakistan - A

8. New Zealand - A

9. Bangladesh - B

10. Ireland - B

11. Zimbabwe - A

12. The Netherlands - B

13. Kenya - A

14. Canada - A

Were we in Group B in place of say England or West Indies, I would genuinely fear missing out on the Quarter Finals. As it is Australia should comfortably come in the top 2 of Group A, thereby setting up a likely quarter final against England, West Indies or Bangladesh.

WORLD CUP: Injury horrors threaten selectors blushes

On Tuesday January 18, Australia's much maligned chairman of selectors and famous ball handling opening batsman Andrew Hilditch announced the nation's 15 man squad to travel to India, Sri Lanka and Bangladesh in just under a month's time and attempt to defend the world cup, a trophy which has made here its home over the last decade. As ever with our selection panel, the squad was devoid of any major surprises and, by extension, any particularly enterprising picks. By far the biggest surprise was the inclusion of Victorian all-rounder John Hastings, over a plethora of well qualified players such as batsmen Shaun Marsh and Callum Ferguson, all rounders Dan Christian and James Hopes, spinner Xavier Doherty and fellow Victorian quick Peter Siddle.

 

World Cup bolter John Hastings in action for

the Victorian Bushrangers.

Structurally the squad follows the model that was to be expected, with 13 of the 15 players locked in well before the date.  Watson, Haddin, Ponting, Clarke, White, M.Hussey, Smith, Johnson, Hauritz, Lee, Tait is the clear default 11that the selectors want in the best case scenario. David Hussey as a reserve batsman and Doug Bollinger as a reserve fast bowler were also as predicted. What was unknown was where the final two places would go. There were four principle options.

* Extra batsman - Shaun Marsh or Callum Ferguson most talked about, but Tim Paine also relevant as both batsman AND keeper.

* Extra all-rounder - Dan Christian a favourite with veteran James Hopes and the promising Hastings coming up on the rails.

* Extra spinner - Xavier Doherty trialled for the role in Game 1 against England last week.

* Extra fast bowler - Peter Siddle at the front of the queue.

There has been much frustration at the omission of Marsh, Ferguson and Siddle, as well as only taking one specialist spinner to the subcontinent. Ultimately though, as much as I may disagree on some of the defaults (David Hussey and Tait to be precise), the two that were picked are very clever choices. In Tim Paine the selectors simultaneously cover for Brad Haddin specifically behind the stumps, and the rest of the batting lineup. Likewise, Hastings kills two birds with one stone. The selectors have obviously felt that with the plethora of express pace, the balance of the side would be best served by an extra bowler, of more medium pace to be a death bowling specialist. Dan Christian is an explosive hitter but not really an international class bowler, and Siddle would skew the team slightly too much towards the bowling department. With Hastings we get the best of both worlds, a genuine all-rounder to maintain the team balance, but one leaning more towards the necessary bowling side than Christian or Hopes would.

However there is a far more pressing issue than the speculative nonsense of the masses. More than any opposition team, injuries could prove to be Australia's true death knell at the notoriously overlong tournament.
Typical fast bowler plights have denied Ryan Harris a certain world cup spot and Clint McKay a probable one. Their injuries have left Johnson and Bollinger (who I surmise would have been the original four along with Harris and McKay) to be joined by Lee and Tait. The misfortune of the pair may at least be a blessing disguise in the shape of Lee, who is in impressive form but looked gone from the reckoning for all money a month ago. But the four quicks we are left with wouldn't strike fear in to the hearts of top quality teams. Johnson remains extraordinarily inconsistent. Tait's body remains woefully inadequate for the demands of professional cricket, and Bollinger is always a hard worker but would hardly scare too many good batsmen. This leaves Brett Lee as the spearhead of the attack. So far he shows every sign of being able to handle this burden but it remains to be seen how his body and form will hold up over a six week tournament.

The Harris and McKay setbacks must feel an age ago though by now. As of writing Australia officially have eleven healthy players in their squad. A huge question mark remains over both the fitness and capabilities of Ricky Ponting, and the chances of Michael Hussey's hamstring healing sufficiently by game 1 look remote. Thirteen fit players on the day the squad was picked may have given the selectors some anxiety. By now their already receding hairlines must be disappearing by the inch every day. Shaun Tait predictably and inevitably  pulled up lame during Australia's victory over England in Hobart yesterday, hot on the heels of Nathan Hauritz' graphic shoulder dislocation sustained while sliding on the dodgy Bellerive outfield. Although there will be no official word until after Hauritz's impending arthroscopic procedure, few who were watching on TV could confidently say that they were looking at a man likely to be fit and match-ready in a mere month.

Shaun Marsh added to the perpetual conveyor belt of morbid irony that constitutes the life of Hilditch and Co by coming in to the side in place of the injured Hussey and responding to his squad omission with a brilliant match-winning 110 in Game 2 of the seven match Commonwealth Bank Series yesterday.

Australian World Cup Squad

Batsmen

Brad Haddin - 33 - Wicket Keeper - Right Hand Opening Batsman

Tim Paine - 26 - Wicket Keeper - Right Hand Opening/Top Order Batsman

Ricky Ponting (Captain) - 36 - Right Hand Top Order Batsman

Michael Clarke (Vice Captain) - 29 - Right Hand Top Order Batsman 

 Cameron White - 27 - Right Hand Middle Order Batsman

David Hussey - 33 - Right Hand Middle Order Batsman

Callum Ferguson* - 26 - Right Hand Middle Order Batsman

All-Rounders

Shane Watson

Steve Smith - 21 -  Right Hand Middle Order Batsman - Right Arm Leg Spin Bowler

John Hastings - 25 - Right Arm Fast Medium Bowler - Right Hand Lower Order Batsman

Spin Bowlers

Jason Krejza** - 28 - Right Arm Off Spin Bowler

Fast Bowlers

Mitchell Johnson - 29 - Left Arm Fast Bowler

Brett Lee - 34 - Right Arm Fast Bowler

Doug Bollinger - 29 - Left Arm Fast Medium Bowler

Shaun Tait - 27 - Right Arm Fast Bowler

*Edit: Ferguson replaces original squad member Michael Hussey who was withdrawn due to a hamstring injury.

**Edit: Krejza replaces original squad member Nathan Hauritz who was withdrawn due to a shoulder injury.

In coming days I will go through the recently announced squads of 14 nations. Obviously many batsman such as Clarke, White and David Hussey have useful and fairly regular part-time bowling skills as well, but my classifications specifically refer to their primary role within the squad, batsman, bowler, all-rounder or keeper. The elevens I outline are the optimum teams I would pick from the available squads of 15, as opposed to any attempt at omniscient predictions of what various national selectors, coaches and captains may do.

Hosford's XI

Watson, Haddin, Ponting, Clarke, White, D.Hussey, Smith, Hastings, Johnson, Lee, Tait

If Ponting and Clarke perform and Tait doesn't kill his body this would be a formidable team, however over the long term Hastings or Bollinger would be a better bet than Tait, and my rebellious streak would rather like to replace Clarke with Tim Paine.

(Edit: Re-evaluating with the updated squad including Ferguson and Krejza, the question becomes one of bowling configuration. Outside whichever three of the frontline four quicks are picked, Hastings and Krejza essentially should fight it out for the final place in the team. Much has been said of the need for spin in India, but the need for your best team is greater. Although Krejza would take wickets, in Indian conditions he is liable to go for many runs, and Hauritz was picked specifically as a containing bowler. The mean pace trio of Lee, Johnson and Tait are the designated wicket-takers. Smith and David Hussey can handle the 10-15 overs of spin duties between them, with help from Clarke and White if more is necessary. Hastings and Watson, although not spinners, fulfil that role of slower containing bowlers. The tie is ultimately broken by Hastings' extra batting value. My choice of Hastings then determines who should take Mike Hussey's No.6 spot. In batting terms I was just favouring Ferguson, but by playing the four fast bowlers David Hussey is needed for his spin bowling.)

Local News Wrap - January 1-14 2011

Cricket

England complete Ashes rout
There was a bizarre feeling at the opening day of the 5th and final Ashes test in Sydney last week. I can attest to it as I was there personally. Although it would be harsh to claim it was an anticlimax, with a packed house piling into the SCG, there was definitely a feeling of perverse irony in all the hearty gusto with which the local fans cheered for the Aussies. As a test match it fast became a never ending tedious anti-climax, or a four day carnival of wonderment if you're English. England were not as devastatingly good as they'd been in Adelaide and Melbourne with bat or ball. Nor were Australia quite so bad as they had been at times during the series. Yet the game ended up every bit as distressingly lopsided, with England amassing their highest ever score in Australia, 644, on their way to a third innings win of the series.

Full scorecard.

Old rivals split short form pair
Although there remains a semblance of novelty and superfluousness to the Twenty20 game, it provided two particularly enjoyable contests this week. The spectre of Australia's Ashes horror meant that the traditional early January T20s were treated with amusingly over exuberant gusto instead of the usual lazy indifference. There have been higher quality games, but both went to the last over and for once it was an intriguing contest between bat and ball, not a nauseating six-a-thon.

England took a thrilling Game One when debutant Chris Woakes scored the necessary 158th run from the last ball of the match, off the bowling of poor old Shane Watson who smashed a wonderful 59 and took four wickets to boot, and still couldn't find himself on the winning team. Game two followed a similar formula, with more frustrating middle order performances limiting Australia to only 147. It would have been worse if not for the efforts of young Aaron Finch who hit an enterprising 53 not out off 33 balls. England looked comfortable with openers Ian Bell and Steve Davies at the crease but after a vital two-wicket over from Mitchell Johnson, the middle order stumbled. Watson once again was a standout with the ball and the pace trio of Lee, Tait and Johnson managed to withstand some late scares and hold on for a much needed 4 run win.

Game 1 scorecard.
Game 2 scorecard.


Football

Socceroos survive medical nightmare

The Asian Cup continues to throw up drama and surprises into its second week. Three time champions and general Asian superpower Saudi Arabia have already booked their tickets home with a shock 1-0 loss to Jordan, following up their 2-1 defeat to Syria in the first game. China also find themselves with a face full of egg after an unexpected 2-0 lesson at the hands of hosts Qatar. Australia's group seems on schedule to finish with the Socceroos and Koreans tied atop the table on seven points after they played out a scrappy but enthralling 1-1 draw. The Socceroos had the better of the first half chances after some good set piece play but found themselves 1-0 down after a defensive lapse in the centre of the park. Mile Jedinak equalised midway through the second half with his first international goal as the Socceroos continued to show impressive elements, but made far too many silly errors and couldn't match the sensational fast passing game of South Korea.

The biggest concern for the Socceroos is a trio of potentially tournament ending injuries to Jason Culina, Luke Wilkshire and David Carney. Culina's central midfield slot should not be hard to fill with Carl Valeri and Matt McKay showing good form, but the respective flank positions in the defensive line could be a bigger problem.

Roar paddle through flood waters
The devastating floods in South-East Queensland have had a profound impact on many in the sporting community. Australian and English cricketers and their respective boards have gone to particular efforts to provide financial support, and today saw a novelty fundraiser featuring the stars of the Tennis world in the lead up to the Australian Open. But it is the A-League who have, in unimportant sporting terms, been affected most of all. The runaway league leaders Brisbane Roar have trained on four different grounds in the past fortnight, and this week found their iconic home Suncorp Stadium under water. Sunday's game against the Wellington Phoenix has been postponed until January 26 but it appears that potentially the entire of the Suncorp's remaining allotment of fixtures may need to be shifted to other grounds around greater Brisbane, or even to Gold Coast United's Skilled Park.

It remains to be seen what effect the troubles of the past week will have on the Roar, who have the luxury of an upcoming bye. If Monday was any indication though the plight of their friends and families will only spur the Roar on. As the crisis in Brisbane began to play out, the team played a thrilling high quality 3-3 draw against an impressive Central Coast Mariners in Gosford. The top 4 remains safe with the Roar, Adelaide United, Mariners and Gold Coast still by far the pick of the competition. But the battle for the remaining two places in the finals remains particularly interesting. Melbourne Victory are looking likely to qualify but are doing their best to throw it all away, with an awful performance at home last weekend, destroyed 4-1 by Adelaide following on from a 2-0 loss to the 8th placed Wellington Pheonix, keeping them within striking distance. Sydney F.C have kept their slim hopes alive with a 2-1 win visiting an inconsistent and injury ravaged Newcastle Jets who nevertheless cling to 6th. Both the Jets and 7th placed Melbourne Heart scored rather inconsequential wins over a decidedly average North Queensland Fury to start the new year, but neither have yet shown enough to consistent form to suggest a finals place is in the bag.

Tennis

Hewitt pulls Kooyong surprise
Preparations are complete for the Australian Open which begins tomorrow at Melbourne Park. Aside from the odd inspiring cameo from names like Molik, Stosur and Dokic, local fans have had precious little to celebrate in the recent past. 2011's edition may not be different in the grand scheme, with Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal looking unbeatable and Kim Clijsters' favouritism shortening every day. But the signs have been promising this week. Hewitt, the clear outsider in ranking terms, took a somewhat unexpected trophy at the disappointingly tiny and insubstantial but still high quality AAMI classic at Kooyong. Hewitt scored three impressive wins over top players. Russian top 10 stars Mikhail Youzhny and Nikolay Davydenko were both quality conquests, and Hewitt wrapped up the title with a 7-5, 6-3 win over Gael Monfils. Hewitt will need all the form he can muster, for a first round clash with the class of long time rival David Nalbandian, who has come off a strong performance in Auckland where he was runner-up to David Ferrer in the Heineken Cup.

Aussie women reverse roles
There is massive hype around Samantha Stosur going into the Australian Open. The world No.6 who reached her first grand slam final in Paris in 2010, is seeded No.5 for the tournament, the highest Australian women's seed since Wendy Turnbull in 1984. However it was not Stosur who flew the flag for the Aussie girls this week but young up and comer Jarmila Groth. Groth took out her second WTA title this week at the Hobart International, beating fellow young sensation Bethanie Mattek-Sands of the United States. It follows Groth's maiden title at the Guangzhou International open in China just four months ago. Stosur meanwhile went out in the second round of the Sydney International to former World No.1 Svetlana Kuznetsova. Despite the setback, Stosur's challenge still looks on track. Kuznetsova was particularly impressive and Stosur gives every indication of being a woman who is peaking at the exact right time.

Favourites wobble at the Asian Cup.

The first round of games in this year's Asian Cup football tournament in Qatar have been completed and once again, we've been given a significant reminder of how compact the competition in Asia has become. Asian powerhouses like Australia, South Korea and Japan may not be achieving quite the progress many suggested was possible early in the decade, but while they've stuttered, the overall burgeoning strength of Asian football has allowed the rest of the pack to close up behind.

The tournament of four years ago was full of unexpected results and finished with a major upset in Iraq being crowned Asian champions, and there's every indication similar upsets could rule this time. Most games in the first week have gone to some sort of schedule, but the prevailing point to be made is that every game has in some way proven closer and more competitive than expected, even including Australia's 4-0 win over India to an extent.

But the major anomaly has been Group B, where the state of Arabian football was spectacularly highlighted by heroic performances from the underrated Jordan and supposed minnows Syria. The Jordanian defence held up throughout the first half against the might of Japan, before a goal from Abdel Fattah against the run of play right on half time. Trailing 1-0 into the second, Japan looked shell shocked, as if the sheer astonishment of such a scoreline had violently struck them across the face. They slowly took control of the game however and 2 minutes into injury time came Maya Yoshida's last gasp, and for all fans of the under-dog, desperately disappointing equaliser.But there was satisfaction for upset junkies just a few hours later when Syria shocked their regional rivals 2-1.

As for the Socceroos, they did what they had to do. India, perplexing qualifiers through a questionable playoff system, were spirited but comfortably outclassed. India's clear standout was goalkeeper Subrata Pal, who prevented a scoreline which could easily have been 7 or 8 to nothing. 4-0 on paper looked like a disappointing result, and the Socceroos certainly were very scratchy in their basic skill execution in the second half. But this kind of lethargy can often result from such gross mismatches. The important boxes were ticked. Three points. Tim Cahill showing he is in fine finishing form. Harry Kewell reminding of his still spectacular prowess with a powerful long range bullet for Australia's 2nd goal. Brett Emerton was also particularly impressive, although there are definite improvements needed, especially from Mile Jedinak and David Carney on the left.

In Group C's other game, South Korea were comfortable but unconvincing winners over Bahrain 2-1. Any worry about The Socceroos being in goal difference danger because of their theoretically small margin over India should not be a concern. Bahrain gave no sign that they will be any threat to Australia. Despite being ranked 7th of the 16 teams in the tournament, and twice coming within a final playoff of reaching the World Cup, Bahrain were clearly out of their depth against South Korea. They showed the clear step down in class from the big boys that the lower-ranked Syria and Jordan were supposed to show. Meanwhile South Korea also were not too intimidating. As ever they relied on their individual brilliance and skills as opposed to any sort of clinical dominance. Providing India can stay motivated through three big losses, the big question really, South Korea shouldn't win by too much more than four.

If such a situation arises where passage to the quarter finals depends on goal difference, then there is no real cause for expectation for glory anyway after such a disappointing group performance.

At any rate, all will become clear on Friday when South Korea and Australia face off in their second group matches. A combination of the surprise results four years ago, FIFA's questionable ranking system and the hosts Qatar, a weak team comparatively, taking one of the four top seed positions in each group for themselves, has allowed the unlikely instance of Asia's two strongest teams on paper ending up in the same group. A convincing win will be needed for the Socceroos if they are to entertain any notion of being genuine contenders for the final trophy.

Results

Group A

Qatar 0-2 Uzbekistan

Kuwait 0-2 China

Group B

Japan 1-1 Jordan

Saudi Arabia 1-2 Syria

Group C

Australia 4-0 India

South Korea 2-1 Bahrain

Group D

North Korea 0-0 UAE

Iraq 1-2 Iran

ASHES REVIEW: Where to for Australia?

At long last the Ashes are mercifully over. The final act of the series was a fittingly lazy prod at a short ball from Michael Beer that trickled lamely back onto the stumps. With this dismissal England won the 5th Test at Sydney by an innings and 83 runs, the narrowest of their three wins in the series. It is statistics like these which point to the magnitude of Australia's dismal failure. Due praise must be heaped on Andrew Strauss' men who performed with a discipline and consistent intensity unprecedented in my lifetime. But for any blatantly prejudiced and angry Australia, it is the systematic failure on and off the field of our boys which has been the true headline grabber.

The painful irony of this disaster of a summer is that it all started to spectacularly. England dismissed inside the first day at Brisbane on the back of a rousing spell of devastating fast bowler from Peter Siddle. Looking back, it was really only this opening day and the 2nd day in Perth when Mitchell Johnson showed fleeting heroics where Australia could be said to have truly shown any sort of dominance. The only perverse consolation out of the series is that England there were so many thoroughly humiliating days that they have blurred into one mind-numbing mesh, with nothing really standing out. After the series opener in Brisbane I thought it would take many years to forget the remarkable English 2nd innings, when they amassed 519 runs for just a single wicket lost. As it happens, it now sits long abandoned in the recesses of the memory, usurped by the comprehensive embarrassment of Adelaide, getting skittled for 98 in Melbourne, and England's mammoth 644 in Sydney.

It's tempting to award every player in the Aussie side a blanket single star but one must try to look through the petulant short term reactions of such a result and be more objective and mature. Here are my assessments on five of our best, if I can muster five.

 Michael Hussey - ****

Obviously a huge outlying shining light for Australia with his efforts. But even still, Hussey's performance is soured slightly by the fact that he contributed very little in the last two tests, always falling at particularly vital pressure situations after getting his eye in. Nevertheless, it was so refreshing to see a flowing Hussey in full flight, and 570 runs at 63 is a great series by anyone (perhaps except Bradman...or Alastair Cook's standards). His epic in Brisbane and crucial match winning hundred in Perth were true classics.

Shane Watson - ***

 There is something immensely frustrating about Shane Watson, a man with the technique and temperament to shadow most of his team-mates, yet who still fails to rack up the dizzying statistics he in reality should. He threatened even Hussey's status as Australia's most consistent batsman of the series, and in all the repeating calamitous collapses from the top order, almost invariably was the survivor, seeing out the new ball. Right as this storm was weathered, with 40 or 50 on the board and a big score beckoning though, comes the customary wicket, usually a frustratingly soft regulation catch behind or LBW. His running between wickets is also beginning to reach Inzamam-like status in its shoddiness. However he is still one of the few Australians who can hold his head up high at all. Adding to this was his underused bowling wares, which were always penetrating and often far outstripped the genuine quicks.

Brad Haddin - ***

 Haddin's performance kind of lies somewhere between Hussey and Watson. His triple stand with Hussey in Brisbane which produced a majestic innings of 136 was not even close to equaled by any other batsman throughout the series. The Hussey-like part comes from the fact that as the series went on and they became the proclaimed savious, the only pair we could rely on, Haddin like Hussey faltered and didn't match his early heights in Melbourne or Sydney. The Watson-like part comes from Haddin being unfailingly consistent but aside from Brisbane, not getting past that 50-60 mark.

 Peter Siddle - ***

I'm a sensitive new-age guy. I invest emotionally with women. I have an unhealthy reliance on the Internet. I'm partial to a bit of Chicago and Air Supply. Actually that last bit isn't true at all. Notwithstanding, my sentimental side wants to give four stars to Siddle just for being so likable and for trying so hard. Siddle's fighting batting when all was lost on more than one occasion was telling. Siddle's pair of six-wicket hauls in Brisbane and Melbourne were both extremely impressive, the first as a genuine match winning spell, the second for its grit and unwavering intensity over long periods. Unfortunately the snag in the series for Siddle was that he essentially was of little use for the rest of the entire series outside those hauls. The two innings' in question accounted for 12 wickets at 10.75 apiece. Outside this he took 2 wickets at 177.50, figures not even the consistently flat and unpenetrating Ben Hilfenhaus could match. In truth both bowled well many times, but fundamentally lack a killer variety, and are inconsistent in their sameness.

Ryan Harris - ***

The question to ask now as a perfect cliche, is what now for Australian cricket? Luckily, or perhaps not, there is no time to deal with such questions yet. The limited overs portion of the summer will soon begin in earnest, and while these games always retain a degree of superfluousness, they at least mean something this year as the world cup comes immediately afterwards. After three consecutive tournaments of utter dominance, it would be the final marker of the true end of an era if Australia failed in its title defence. After the world cup is completely in April, four months pass until Australia's next test series in Sri Lanka. Ponting's performance as captain and batsman in the world cup will make a big difference in final decisions for this tour. The talent is there in the Australian line-up, the discipline and seasoned winning know-how is not. With Simon Katich returning in place of the still promising but not quite ready Phil Hughes, Khawaja as the exciting new no.3, and Ponting at 6, we'd have a batting line-up able to dominate anyone on its day, if still slightly below the nauseatingly brilliant quality of India and South Africa.

The bowling is less simple. Still no spinner has stamped his authority on the team, thanks in part to the selectors' morbid wish to prevent anyone doing so. In the short term Nathan Hauritz must be the way to go, with his NSW team-mates O'Keefe and Smith needing to develop their bowling to become genuine Test all-rounders of the future. The fast bowling stocks are deep and talented. But if Johnson, Siddle, Hilfenhaus, Harris and Bollinger are really the most skilled in the country, is there cause for concern? It's all well and good to praise the England batsman or claim bad luck and a lack of consistency forthcoming in the future as responsible for the displays this summer, but the fact remains the heights England's totals reached, and the regularity with which they did so is unacceptable. If none of those men can prove up to the challenge in the coming year, there's enough in the drawer to replace them wholesale. If anything can rouse consistent quality from the quick men, surely it is that threat.

Again though, all credit to England. They are a side of the quality not seen in the motherland since the Gatting's, Gower's, Gooch's and Botham's reigned over Australia (but certainly not the world) in the 80s, perhaps even the Illingworth led era nearly four decades ago. Hopefully they go on to be an all-time great, record-setting, world-dominating No.1 team. As hard as this would be to swallow, it might just make this Australian team seem less mediocre in context.

1st Test - Brisbane

England - 260 (Bell 76, Cook 67, Siddle 6/54)
Australia - 481 (Hussey 195, Haddin 136, Finn 6/125)
England - 1 dec 519 (Cook 235 n.o, Trott 135 n.o, Strauss 110, North 1/47)
Australia - 1/101 (Ponting 51 n.o, Watson 41 n.o, Broad 1/18)


MATCH DRAWN
MotM - Alastair Cook (Eng)

5 Test series level 0-0 after 1 Test

Full scorecard here. 




2nd Test - Adelaide

Australia - 245 (Hussey 93, Haddin 56, Watson 51, Anderson 4/51)
England - 5 dec 620 (Pietersen 227, Cook 148, Trott 78, Bell 68 n.o)
Australia - 304 (Clarke 80, Watson 57, Hussey 52, Swann 5/91)

England won by An Innings and 71 runs
MotM - Kevin Pietersen (Eng)

England lead 5 Test series 1-0 after 2 Tests

Full Scorecard here.








3rd Test - Perth

Australia - 268 (Johnson 62, Hussey 61, Haddin 53, Anderson 3/61, Tremlett 3/63)
England - 187 (Bell 53, Strauss 52, Johnson 6/38, Harris 3/59)
Australia - 309 (Hussey 116, Watson 95, Tremlett 5/87)
England - 123 (Trott 31, Harris 6/47, Johnson 3/44)

Australia won by 267 runs
MotM - Mitchell Johnson (Aus)

5 Test series level 1-1 after 3 Tests

Full Scorecard here. 




4th Test - Melbourne

Australia - 98 (Clarke 20, Tremlett 4/26, Anderson 4/44)
England - 513 (Trott 168 n.o, Prior 85, Cook 82, Siddle 6/75)
Australia - 258 (Haddin 55 n.o, Watson 54, Siddle 40, Bresnan 4/50)

England won by an Innings and 157 runs
MotM - Jonathon Trott (Eng)

England lead 5 Test series 2-1 after 4 Tests (England retain the Ashes)


Full Scorecard here.




5th Test - Sydney

Australia - 280 (Johnson 53, Watson 45, Khawaja 37, Anderson 4/66)
England - 644 (Cook 189, Prior 118, Bell 115, Johnson 4/168)
Australia - 282 (Smith 54 n.o, Siddle 43, Clarke 41, Anderson 3/61, Tremlett 3/79)

England won by an Innins and 83 runs
MotM - Alastair Cook (Eng)

England win the 5 Test series 3-1
MotS - Alastair Cook (Eng)


Full Scorecard here.

*Insert beer drinking pun here*

Australia's unlikely new recruit Michael Beer,

still looking thoroughly shell shocked.

The Australian selectors look like they have come full circle in their horrendous desperation, and have now become a distinctly unamusing parody of 90s England revolving door policies. The squad for Thursday's 3rd Ashes Test in Perth includes unknown Western Australian left-arm spinner Michael Beer, who only made his first class debut in October and has been picked supposedly for a knowledge of the Perth pitch despite only moving there from Victoria in this past year. Clearly the move smacks of desperation and has been panned from all corners. However it distracts (perhaps not without intent) from what is for once a well chosen squad. Although Beer being selected in the 11 would be an eyebrow-raising move, logical evidence (which unfortunately can't be relied upon when it comes to our selection panel) would suggest that Beer surely will not play, and that consequently the squad is a clever one.

The hype over Beer has overshadowed some astute selection calls. Conventional wisdom said Marcus North, Xavier Doherty and Doug Bollinger must go, and they have. Steven Smith, Mitchell Johnson and Ben Hilfenhaus have returned and although it would be nice to see a new fresh batsman like Usman Khawaja, the focus has to be on fixing the bowling horrors of the first two Tests. Australia have picked a perfectly balanced squad for this vital Perth Test. However this is all conditional (and its a big if) on Beer not playing. Make no mistake I rate young Beer, in fact as astonishing as it may seem I had heard of him properly before this week. But the other eleven in this squad of twelve must surely be the correct team for Perth, out of anyone not just this set of twelve.

Obviously, with reason, people must ask why Beer would be selected over the experienced and in form Nathan Hauritz. Or if the selectors insist on troubling England with left arm orthodox spin why not opt for New South Welshman Steve O'Keefe who impressed against the Poms playing for Australia A. But the selectors from what I can tell have their eleven decided already, and if the fight is for a position as token twelfth man Beer does no harm. The reason the eleven seems set is because the needs of a notoriously spin-unfriendly Perth pitch, and the rigidity of the squad means there can only be one plausible team. Watson, Hughes (replacing the injured Simon Katich), Ponting, Clarke, Hussey, Haddin, Smith, Johnson, Harris, Siddle, Hilfenhaus. Hauritz or O'Keefe may be obviously more qualified to play than Beer, but truthfully neither would fit into the team based on the squad picked. Furthermore having bowlers of that calibre could result in Ponting and the selectors failing to resist temptation and playing the specialist spinner, which would be a mistake. Playing a Hauritz or an O'Keefe with Smith would mean two spinners, something irrational for the demands of the Perth wicket. The only other option would be playing Hauritz/O'Keefe ahead of Smith, which would dramatically affect the balance of the side. Even with both Hauritz and O'Keefe being useful lower order batsmen, it would be very poor judgement to rely on a batting lineup with an out of form and short on confidence Mitchell Johnson at 7. Five bowlers only works when one of them is the all-rounder Smith.

On the surface it would seem that if a batsman like Khawaja or Callum Ferguson was picked instead of Beer, that would give the squad a better overall balance and offer more flexible options. Digging deeper even this proves untrue through. Playing an extra batsman at No.6 would mean one of two things. Either there would be four fast bowlers and no spinner, not the smartest option. Or Smith would play at No.8 which again is clearly a badly balanced side with one too many batsmen, and only three front line bowlers. With Beer in the squad he operates as a safe 'designated twelfth man' while the prescribed eleven can focus on preparation for the match.

It may seem rather cruel to hand the young man what looks like a miracle debut on his home track only to relegate him to 12th man, but I don't doubt Beer is aware of the plan. If the eleven is indeed set then there's no reason not to give a promising young player a week in the Aussie squad to really learn and help him develop as a player. I don't know if I'm being too lenient on the selectors but I just like the idea of bringing in an exuberant fresh face to remind the boys of the passion and excitement playing for Australia should bring, as opposed to bringing in an old hand like Hauritz to create needless selection dilemmas and dissatisfaction on the part of whoever is chosen not to play.

Maybe Hilditch and co are just panicking and we'll see our twelfth spinner in five years.

Australian Squad - 3rd Test vs England @ Perth, December 16-20
Ricky Ponting - Captain
Michael Clarke - Vice Captain
Shane Watson
Philip Hughes
Michael Hussey
Brad Haddin
Steven Smith
Mitchell Johnson
Ryan Harris
Peter Siddle
Ben Hilfenhaus
Michael Beer

Local News Wrap - December 6-12 2010

Cricket: By far the most interesting, newsworthy and least painful (although not by much) set of breaking stories this week has involved off-field dramas of selection and injury, not the cataclysmic mess that was the cricket. The latest bizarre selection move on Australia's part is Western Australian off-spinner and general punny name cannon fodder Michael Beer being plucked from the deepest depths of obscurity for the 3rd test in Perth this week.

Rugby League: My beloved Parramatta Eels seem to be doing an unusual amount of publicity events recently, culminating in a Christmas visit to a local shopping centre. One doubts if more publicity is the best way to diffuse the speculation over Timana Tahu's future. But then it could be worse, they could have Timana's PR agents.

AFL: The amusing saga of all-round nice guy Gary Ablett and all-round vaguely suspicious character Mark Thompson continues unchecked. Recent revelations to fuel the fire were that former Geelong premiership coach Thompson was secretly in talks with Essendon well into the previous season, while simultaneously berating Ablett for considering his eventual defection to the Gold Coast Suns. Now it seems that Thompson also had the indignant hypocrisy to fall out with Ablett over his contemplation. Ablett revealed this week that the pair have barely spoken since April, angering club legend John "Sam" Newman.
"That is the most pathetic thing I have ever heard" Newman was quoted as saying. When Sam Newman is disgusted by something you know you have a problem.

Football: The A-League continues to take advantage of being the only substantial sporting league in the country over summer, with some compelling games this week. The Brisbane Roar have continued to show themselves as the real deal, scoring their first ever win in Sydney, 1-0 over Sydney FC. The result, a record-extending 16th straight game without defeat, leaves them an ominous seven points clear of Adelaide United, despite their comfortable 2-0 win over the North Queensland Fury. Gold Coast and Central Coast look solid in 3rd and 4th after a 2-0 win over the hapless travellers Wellington, and a 1-1 draw at Perth respectively. Meanwhile the Melbourne Victory pulled out one of their best performances of the year to win the local derby against the Heart 3-1.

Formula 1: Logic and reason has finally returned to the FIA's lawmakers, with the controversial team orders rule being repealed for 2011, an absurd 9 years after it came in. The rule was implemented in response to a pair of farcical staged finishes by Ferrari drivers Michael Schumacher and Rubens Barrichello during their dominant 2002 season. Regardless of opinions on whether the fans deserve better, or should hack the fact that F1 is a steam sport fundamentally, what was always unanimous was dislike of the rule because of its arbitrariness. Teams have taken to merely using predefined codes or careful wording to disseminate the same message, resulting in a product equally as 'staged', but less honest. For 2011 team orders will return, distasteful maybe, but transparent definitely. Meanwhile Mark Webber has admitted to sustaining a broken shoulder in a mountain-bike accident before the championship-deciding last four races of 2010 (before which he led the title chase). I believe Webber if he claims that the injury did not play a role in denying him the championship, but can't help but think that after two major incidents in a row, Webber should not go near a bicycle of any form ever again.

V8 Supercars: James Courtney has wrapped up the 2010 V8 Supercar title as expected, but he tried his hardest to throw it away, with a 15th and a 14th place finish in the spectacular final weekend on the streets of Sydney Olympic Park. A violent rainstorm in Race 1 resulted in the astonishing happening of all three title contenders hitting the barriers at the same time in the same corner (Whincup and Winterbottom joining Courtney in the wall). Courtney alone of the three was able to salvage some points, scraping home 15th as Dale Wood took a hugely unexpected maiden win. Shane Van Gisbergen looked on track to make it two debut winners from two on Sunday but had the heartbreaking misfortune of running out of fuel on the final lap, handing victory to Holdsworth. Courtney recovered from a comically inexact pit stop to finish 14th and deny Jamie Whincup a hat-trick of titles.

Boxing: Wednesday December 8 saw a thoroughly arbitrary yet strangely interesting exhibition bout between two-time world champion Anthony Mundine and Foxtel reality show "The Contender" winner Garth Wood. Interesting is meant quite liberally however as the fight was of consistently atrocious quality. But it instantly took on a special meaning when Wood landed a flush blow to Mundine's chin in the 5th and left him on the canvas. Wood's KO win was one of the biggest upsets in Australian boxing history. Moreover it was a pleasant surprise and general inspirational source of hope to any decent person to see Mundine dealt the kind of come-uppance any passively interested Aussie boxing fan (any greater interest results in far too much exposure to Mundine's intolerable character) has been desperately waiting for.

FINAL REPORT: Pietersen stars in unprecedented thrashing

Australia vs England, 2nd Test - Adelaide Oval, Adelaide
Thursday December 2-Monday December 6 2010.

Australia - 245 (Hussey 93, Haddin 56, Watson 51, Anderson 4/51)
England - 5 dec 620 (Pietersen 227, Cook 148, Trott 78, Bell 68 n.o)
Australia - 304 (Clarke 80, Watson 57, Hussey 52, Swann 5/91)

England won by An Innings and 71 runs


MotM - Kevin Pietersen (Eng)
England lead 5 Test series 1-0 after 2 Tests


Full Scorecard here.

 A pained and perturbed Ricky Ponting forced 

to face the media music again.

What to say and where to turn as an Australian cricket fan? The four and a bit days of horror which transmitted out of Adelaide this week felt as close to watching a friend die as any arbitrary frivolous sports game could ever possibly feel. I personally, with the typical sleeping pattern of my age (and it must be said of a lover of worldwide sport) found myself accidentally slumped in a post-late night stupor on my couch at 11am EST this past Thursday. After my fleeting nap I jerked awake to see AUS 3/2 on the screen in front of me. Never has missing the start of an important cricket match felt so good. All in all, for all the consistently good bowling of England on Day 1, for all the heroics of Cook and Pietersen with the bat, and for all the final morning wiles of Graeme Swann, in reality I missed the decisive point of the Test match. The stunned silence and general sense of amazement that filtered through from the generous Adelaide crowd (a post Bodyline-record) and the commentary box gave off an air of exasperated desperation, as if the death of the modern golden age of Australian cricket was playing out in front of our eyes. It was the way it happened too. Simon Katich run out for an astonishing diamond duck after yet another woeful misunderstanding with Shane Watson in the first over of the match. Next ball the trump card Ponting gone and Australia 2/0. Then at 2/2 Michael Clarke gave yet another sign of his immature impetuosity, and general inability to make vital runs in pressure situations. The airiness with Clarke swatted a James Anderson full ball, inevitably edging to slip, was enough to fry the blood.

From 3/2 Australia started to dig itself out of the hole, but any time it got close to some sort of comfort another wicket fell. Watson and North both threw away solid starts at crucial times. Michael Hussey led the Australian recovery again with another beautiful innings. But he was snuffed out on 93 by a gem from Graeme Swann. This was the end of any meaningful resistance. Brad Haddin was last man out for a well made 56, but the damage was done, Australia out inside a day for a paltry 245, paltry on such a flat batting beauty of an Adelaide wicket. After Day 1 the dialogue from the Australians to the press was that batting was not as easy as it was made out and a similar tight bowling display to the English could keep the match competitive. When Andrew Strauss left the third ball of Day 2 to go through to the keeper and was bowled by Doug Bollinger for 1 there were fleeting hopes of fight. But Alastair Cook and Jonathan Trott, extending their Brisbane vigil, showed the true virtue of the pitch, adding another 173 to their unbeaten 329 from the week before. Trott fell for 78 to Ryan Harris, the only Australian bowler to maintain any sustained pressure, but that only brought Kevin Pietersen to the crease.

It seems astonishing to think that Pietersen's fear factor was paramount in 2005 and 2006, and that the last 18 months of scratchy form had consigned this supposedly to the history books. After all his iconic efforts in helping England win that special series in 2005 however, nothing came close to his achievements in Adelaide. His second career double century, a career best 227, batting from late on Day 2 until the 4th morning. KP's effort even put Alastair Cook in the shade, despite the fact that he made another 148 following on from Brisbane's unbeaten 235. Cook now has a ridiculous aggregate of 350 runs in 3 innings at an average of 175. One stat I know doesn't exist is the scoring of a double century in every match of a 5 test series. Would you rule it out on the Australian bowling evidence presented thus far?

So after compiling all of 620 runs for just 5 wickets lost, England saw fit to declare on the 4th morning and set about their first innings win over Australia in 24 years. Shane Watson looked good for 57 (his dismissal on such scores is fast becoming tiresome) and Simon Katich fought hard for 43 through an Achilles injury that has proved fatal to his series. But all in all Michael Clarke and Michael Hussey (with a little help from some ominous grey skies) looked like they might just give us a chance of getting away with the impossible, and heading to Perth still locked at zero in the series. Then Michael Clarke padded an amicable little dolly from Kevin Pietersen straight to the short leg fieldsman, Cook no less, in the last over of the day. Going to sleep on the final evening all looked lost after that final blow but you never know, there's fight to come in the batting order and rain to be showered. But the feeble resistance showed by as stoic fighters as Hussey, North and Haddin

The post-mortem was as swift and decisive as it was predictable. Former English captain Duncan Fletcher stated that Australia's worst case scenario was a 3-0 series defeat.

"The only ground I can see Australia getting a draw at is Melbourne. If the wicket there is as flat as it has been in previous years then Australia should be able to bat out the match." Fletcher said writing for The Guardian.

Comparisons to the lowest depths of Australian cricket in living memory, namely the early to mid 80s period of Allan Border led struggle and revival, are coming thick and fast. Perhaps inevitably, but still somewhat astonishingly, the calls for Shane Warne's return are louder than ever. Respected Australian journalist and noted Warne-basher Peter Fitzsimons leads the crusade, saying that the emergency need to save and win the Ashes is more important right now than any longer term considerations. Always looking on the bright side, The Courier Mail's Robert Craddock expressed a view that such a hiding may be what is needed to push Australian cricket in a positive direction.

"Sometimes a serious kick up the backside can do far more good than harm. Losing the Ashes in 2005 was one of the best things that happened to Australia in recent times."

I can't help but feeling however that is clutching at straws to an extent, the long term prognosis is far more dire than it was in 2005 and it seems unlikely that any real substantive rebirth in Australian prospects is less than a few years away at best. Malcolm Conn's ironic comparison to Australia's last innings defeat at the hands of England, in 1986-87, also presents as a veneer of false hope. But perhaps it is too presumptuous to say a 4-0 Australian victory in England in 2013 isn't out of the question. Or perhaps it isn't.

For all the much deserved Australia bashing however, credit must go to England. They played perhaps their most complete near-perfect Ashes Test in decades. Brisbane showed the potential for batting dominance but in Adelaide in some ways, considering how many more questions were raised about the attack, it was the fantastic bowling performance, particularly of James Anderson and Graeme Swann that really stole the show.

The question for Australia now is what to do with their team for Perth. Panicky wholesale switching would do little to anybody's confidence and have no greater effect than sticking with the same 11. However in all likelihood Marcus North and Xavier Doherty at least must go, joining Simon Katich on the sidelines. Katich's replacement is the easy part. Selectors are likely to go straight for their default of Philip Hughes, despite the fact that older, more experienced both domestically and internationally and more technically sound Western Australian opener Shaun Marsh has been in epic Sheffield Shield form, with statistics dwarfing those of Hughes.

Usman Khawaja coming in for Marcus North is not as simple as it sounds, especially as Khawaja has very little experience batting so low down the order. Nathan Hauritz chose this week's vital match for NSW against WA to score a rather unexpected maiden first class hundred rather than taking any wickets. However he took an impressive five wickets on a test-reminiscent Perth pitch very recently and must be a safer option than Steven Smith (although he at least would bolster our fledgling tail). The questions are endless? Do we bring Mitchell Johnson and Ben Hilfenhaus back? Should the selectors bite the bullet and breed Khawaja, Ferguson, McKay, George, Copland, or countless other youngsters. Maybe Warne should come back. It would at least be less complicated and although I am not convinced that he could truly weave his old magic, his mere presence might be enough and certainly his tactical nous would improve the situation. It has been quite astonishing to see how freely and easily Warne has been able to pick holes in Ponting's tactics live in commentary and suggest more interesting options, and how often his suspicions tend to turn out right.

Maybe you'll consider it Shane? It would be spectacularly newsworthy if nothing else.

Highlights
*** - It's hard to think of any out of such a disaster. Michael Hussey must come instantly to the surface though. His form and timing still look impeccable and if we are to somehow stay in the series more big hundreds will help the cause, if we can't then at least Aussies have one shining light. His rash shot to start the rout early on the final day has left quite a big scar on the match for him though.

** - Ryan Harris. He may only have 2 for 84 to show for his work at the Adelaide Oval, but this is substantially better than any of his front line counterparts, all of whom conceded more than 100 runs. Aside from Siddle's first innings heroics in Brisbane a decade ago it now feels like, Harris is the only bowler available who really deserves to play in Perth at all. Ben Hilfenhaus surely must also return as he I felt did very little to deserve being dropped in the first place and certainly couldn't perform any worse than Doug Bollinger did in Adelaide.

* - As unusual as it may be to see me giving praise to Michael Clarke, his second innings 80 was a tough fighting knock at a time when Clarke didn't look to be any right state form wise to provide such an innings. It also could have gone partially the way in silencing those who say he doesn't make scores in pressure situations, if he hadn't of thrown it away on the last ball of the day. Nevertheless it gives hope that he might be able to put some sort of runs together in coming Tests.

Lowlights
*** - It's difficult to know where to begin. Yet when you consider that the last two English innings have cost 1037 runs for just 6 wickets, it isn't really. Five fast men, and a woefully underused Shane Watson, have tried and none have effectively succeeded in stopping the terrifying flow of runs from English bats. With every pitch in Australia usually playing decidedly flat, and with every logical fast-bowling option tried already, its impossible to think how we're going to stop them and frighteningly rational to wonder if England will just keep racking up 500,600,700 in every first innings.

** - Ricky Ponting. Today I will not speak of his captaincy, primarily because his shortcomings are now so visibly self-evident that I have little need to say anything. It is his batting which is really letting us down. For all the talk of being past his best (which he may be in terms of consistency at least), Ponting showed in India that his actual skills and talents have not diminished one bit. Watson is batting solidly enough, and Hussey so beautifully, that if Ponting could put some big innings together under pressure (as opposed to superfluous knocks like Day 5 at the Gabba) it would make a huge difference, not just in the obvious way but mentally for the whole team. Ponting is the talisman. Advancing he may be in age but he remains that golden prized wicket everyone wants. Like Pietersen, it doesn't really matter what form Ponting is in, you know he can take the game away from you and lift the whole team with him. If he can score a few hundreds now he might just save his place in the team post-Ashes even if his captaincy is beyond salvation.

* - Xavier Doherty. It may be harsh to give him his own star, particularly after all my praise for him as recently as Brisbane. But this star is more earned by the selectors and whoever is running the spin bowling program in Australia in general than for Doherty himself. For all his admirable effort and through my general enthusiastic support of him, must however go, he has shown with figures of 1 for 158 in 27 overs that he really isn't up to Test standard. Some may say that Shane Warne started similarly and faith should be shown? Yes it should be but only when all prevailing evidence says so. The faith should have been in Nathan Hauritz in the first place. Even if he comes back for Perth it's impossible to know how his sacking has affected his confidence.

FINAL REPORT: Cook and Trott ensure remarkable draw

Australia vs England, 1st Test - Day 5
Monday November 29 2010.

England - 260 (Bell 76, Cook 67, Siddle 6/54)
Australia - 481 (Hussey 195, Haddin 136, Finn 6/125)
England - 1 dec 519 (Cook 235 n.o, Trott 135 n.o, Strauss 110, North 1/47)
Australia - 1/101 (Ponting 51 n.o, Watson 41 n.o, Broad 1/18)


MATCH DRAWN

MotM - Alastair Cook (Eng)
5 Test series level 0-0 after 1 Test

Full scorecard here.

So the 1st Test of this summer's much anticipated Ashes series is complete, and the status quo is maintained. There was something distinctly anticlimactic about the last session on Monday as the match petered to an obvious draw, after weeks of hype and four days of high quality Test cricket. But nevertheless the status quo that the 0-0 scoreline claims to portray is far from how it feels, particularly as an Australian. The distressing manner of Australia's bowling meltdown resulting in the draw means the teams move to Adelaide for the 2nd test on Friday with a clear psychological field of play, England with the upper hand. The amazing feats throughout the first Test, combined with its eventual result after it all, mean this week feels almost like an extended hype and build up. Rather than a more down to earth feeling of 'OK the series has begun' leading to a 2nd Test, instead we remain in a pre-1st Test kind of agonizing limbo, but magnified a hundred times. It is still impossible to pick the outcome of this series. Spectacular highlights and glaring problems remain in both camps.

The 1st Test felt like a strange bastard child of the past three Ashes series, from the 2005esque spectacular drama and compellingness of contest, to Australia slowly but surely developing a 2006-07esque upper advantage at home. In the end, looking back at a Test littered with spectacular moments and feats from individuals, I am left with a 2009 reminiscent feeling that both these sides are far below the quality they should be and that The Ashes could be a case of who screws up the least over five tests.

Monday’s final day provided, as was feared, with more of the same following on from Day 4. Alastair Cook and Jonathon Trott, resuming at 1/309, continued to put Australia’s faltering bowlers to the sword as they quickly snuffed out any remote hopes of an Australia victory. Michael Clarke summed up Australia’s day with a truly atrocious dropped catch at first slip. That chance, as well as a late difficult grass from Ponting both came from the bowling of Shane Watson who looked easily the most threatening yet was barely used. Many arguments are made that Watson needs to be moved down the batting order so as to free up more bowling duties, but I wonder if such a move is necessary and if we, or more importantly Ponting, underestimate his fitness and ability to back up. Although the game was never realistically winnable, England nevertheless were always going to declare at some point, in order to get a thoroughly demoralised Australia back in grudgingly and cause more damage. By the time this call came from Strauss England was an astonishing and rather nightmarish 1 wicket for 519.

Alastair Cook finished with an epic unbeaten 235. Cook is a batsman free of large flourish who seems to be nothing but walking technique, and whose technique considering that is rather flawed, yet somehow he now has 14 test hundreds before the age of 26. England’s top 6 consists of Strauss, Pietersen, Collingwood and Bell, all vastly experienced and proven class acts (albeit less so against Australia for Bell). Before the series Australia surely spoke of two batsmen as potential strike zones. Firstly: Cook, the weak link with questionable technique and questionable precedent in Australian conditions. Secondly: Trott, the debut tourist with little Test experience. Yet it was these two who put on a mammoth and unbeaten partnership of 321, duly passing Michael Hussey and Brad Haddin’s two day old record for the biggest Test partnership at Brisbane. TrottAustralia with 135 not out. Thankfully Shane Watson and Ricky Ponting prevented further psychological haemorrhaging by overcoming the early loss of Simon Katich for 4 and batting solidly until stumps. Ponting looked fantastic in an unbeaten 51 at faster than a run a ball and fairly quickly broke apart the plans of the English quicks. But their late efforts couldn’t mask the disappointment and overall trepidation looking at the rest of the series. One for 517, as much as it may prove to be a freak one-off, nevertheless is not acceptable by any standard. For their part the selectors have taken the positive step of adding fast bowlers Doug Bollinger and Ryan Harris to the 2^nd test squad.

I only hope we don’t end up with a 0-0 series draw because neither team can take 20 wickets. This is an exaggeration but not by much, both bowling units look thoroughly unconvincing (thanks to Graeme Swann’s lack of substance in Brisbane). The Ashes may very easily be won and lost, just like in 2009, by the odd individual bowling brilliance. Andrew Flintoff at Lords and Stuart Broad at The Oval provided these in 2009 and coincidentally there were England’s only two wins of the series. Peter Siddle provided this time around and Australia weren’t able to capitalise. More to the point, in this landscape the Ashes may come down to which batting line-up avoids inexplicable collapses. It is through this criteria that I express frustration at Marcus North being retained in the squad, and continued annoyance at Michael Clarke’s soap opera. Australia only needs to bat solidly throughout the series and it could easily be winnable, especially as England showed a penchant for collapse in the first innings. There won’t always be a Hussey/Haddin partnership to save the day.



Highlights
*** - Ricky Ponting. Although it was to be fair, a completely inconsequential innings, Ponting's quick fire 51 not out to end the match did look suspiciously like his best form so hopefully, while I think he will still continue to fail on occasions, on those times he doesn't we might still get 2 or 3 vintage Ponting classics this summer.

** - Shane Watson. Although 41 runs and no wickets is hardly a memorable day. Watson again showed today that he is vastly underrated with the ball then backed it up with another solid looking stint with the bat. Ponting really must have faith in the man and bowl him a great deal more.

* - Alastair Cook. Shocking though it may seem I am in fact paying tribute to an Englishmen. As painful as it was to watch him bat for the best part of 11 hours, it was a wonderfully grandiose innings, one of those rare gems. Cook also unknowingly broke another of Bradman's precious records, namely taking the highest Test score at the Gabba from the Don.


Lowlights
*** - 1/517. I don't really know who I'm conclusively blaming but that score is quite absurd. Even in this new age of rebuilding and being No.5 in the world rankings, Australia have no right allowing oppositions to so thoroughly destroy us like that.


** - Surprise surprise it's Mitchell Johnson. He completed his wonderfully inadequate match by finishing with the inauspicious figures of 0/108. Rumours are that the selectors have bitten the bullet and sacked him for Adelaide. Although I wish him well and desperately hope for classic Johnson to win Test matches for Australia in the future, this man currently in the team is not the same man. Johnson must not play in Adelaide, I may not watch if he does. 


* - The Brisbane people. To be fair it was Day 5 of a Test match almost foregone to be a draw, on a working Monday. But I'm from Sydney and tend to enjoy slandering Queenslanders so I'll take this time to admonish the crowd on Monday, or lack thereof. While I too appreciate the general unimportance of a draw-headed last day, this is the Ashes and with the Barmy Army always out in force, if Aussie supporter numbers slip too low they can be usurped by English numbers. This got very close to being the case on Monday and there is a psychological principle of basic home country ethics to deal with. This is Australia, the dreaded doom land English cricket comes to die. It is insultingly unspeakable that they can play a single day of cricket in Australia in a partisan pro-English atmosphere.